The three of you who have read any of my Blogs know I do not like religion in general and the Catholic Church in particular. I think that Religion is nothing more than a big business that has as its only goal to make money and lots of it! It has little, if anything, to do with saving your soul and helping you get to heaven.
I was raised Catholic, attending Catholic elementary, high school and even college. Although, by the time I went to college I reached my stated conclusions on what religion was and how it operated - by scaring the begeebees out of everyone and convincing their followers that religion was how one got to know god and attain eternal salvation with him. I dismiss all of this as crap and the work of evil minded people intent on making a ton of money playing on your fears and needs. But my anger does not stem from my belief that religion is a sham and its leaders are charlatans. It stems from the fact that I was born gay and growing up Catholic, was ridiculed, persecuted and filled with enormous self loathing so that I constantly feared being discovered and then being run out of my family, loose all my friends and, worse of all, loose favor with god and be sent directly to hell upon my death.
When I finally could not keep my dirty little secret any longer, I confessed my "sin" to two priests. The first priest threw me out of his confessional and the second priest took me to bed and that, he said, was to help me cope with my being gay. Fortunately, I was able to survive these two occurrences and, putting them aside, was able to live a life with some measure of happiness because I forevermore disregarded any and all Catholic teaching/dogma and came out as a gay man to my family and friends. I began living, for the most part, as the person I was born as, unencumbered with lies about how I spent my weekends and why I wasn’t married. There was one exception to my new found freedom and that was at work, for I never came out at work fearing that I would be fired, the stated reason would not be my homosexuality but because my work would suddenly become unacceptable for unexplained and undocumented reasons. Corporate America had adopted a “Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell policy long before the U.S. military.
I watched the priest scandal play itself out and was disgusted but not surprised at how the Catholic leadership assumed their phony righteous indignation at the boys and girls that were molested by one priest after another but who, the Church attempted to accuse, were making the whole thing up, all two to three thousand of them (right!), in an attempt to extort money from the Church. Fortunately, the truth has a way of getting out and soon it was apparent that the Church was not only lying about the numerous molestations but had been actively covering them up like an overworked cat in the world’s biggest litter box.
I enjoyed watching the Holy Mother(fucking) Church try to rally the Faithful around the accused priests and attempt to paint them as poor, maligned servants of god who were being attacked and their reputations destroyed by the news media, that the Church said was against anything Catholic and that had been acting irresponsibly toward the Church for years.
We all know how it turned out with the Church paying the boys and girls hundreds of millions of dollars in judgments and having to admit that they, the Catholic Church, did indeed have a very serious problem.
Then, last summer, the Church went too far in my opinion when they issued a prayer to be said before having sex (of course this was intended for married couples only). Well, that punched my last button and I sat down and wrote the following little ditty that I disrespectfully dedicate to The Catholic Prayer before Sex as it might relate to the priest scandal.
Holy Sex! (Holy Shit!)
Now I lay me down for sex
He’s only twelve but what the heck
He’s not developed, that’s for sure
But I could help him to mature
Isn’t that what priests are for?
To give of ourselves in no small measure
In order that we give sexual pleasure
To Catholic boys, so innocent and devout
And suck their willies until they shout
Bless me Father I’m coming in your mouth!
The Catholic Church, Oh what a Mother
Who rewards her children like no other
With a sex prayer that Mom and Dad can state
And maintain their soul’s spotless slate.
Not to be said before you masturbate!
I became a priest, you see,
Not to develop spiritually,
But to hide my homosexuality
I was raised Catholic, attending Catholic elementary, high school and even college. Although, by the time I went to college I reached my stated conclusions on what religion was and how it operated - by scaring the begeebees out of everyone and convincing their followers that religion was how one got to know god and attain eternal salvation with him. I dismiss all of this as crap and the work of evil minded people intent on making a ton of money playing on your fears and needs. But my anger does not stem from my belief that religion is a sham and its leaders are charlatans. It stems from the fact that I was born gay and growing up Catholic, was ridiculed, persecuted and filled with enormous self loathing so that I constantly feared being discovered and then being run out of my family, loose all my friends and, worse of all, loose favor with god and be sent directly to hell upon my death.
When I finally could not keep my dirty little secret any longer, I confessed my "sin" to two priests. The first priest threw me out of his confessional and the second priest took me to bed and that, he said, was to help me cope with my being gay. Fortunately, I was able to survive these two occurrences and, putting them aside, was able to live a life with some measure of happiness because I forevermore disregarded any and all Catholic teaching/dogma and came out as a gay man to my family and friends. I began living, for the most part, as the person I was born as, unencumbered with lies about how I spent my weekends and why I wasn’t married. There was one exception to my new found freedom and that was at work, for I never came out at work fearing that I would be fired, the stated reason would not be my homosexuality but because my work would suddenly become unacceptable for unexplained and undocumented reasons. Corporate America had adopted a “Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell policy long before the U.S. military.
I watched the priest scandal play itself out and was disgusted but not surprised at how the Catholic leadership assumed their phony righteous indignation at the boys and girls that were molested by one priest after another but who, the Church attempted to accuse, were making the whole thing up, all two to three thousand of them (right!), in an attempt to extort money from the Church. Fortunately, the truth has a way of getting out and soon it was apparent that the Church was not only lying about the numerous molestations but had been actively covering them up like an overworked cat in the world’s biggest litter box.
I enjoyed watching the Holy Mother(fucking) Church try to rally the Faithful around the accused priests and attempt to paint them as poor, maligned servants of god who were being attacked and their reputations destroyed by the news media, that the Church said was against anything Catholic and that had been acting irresponsibly toward the Church for years.
We all know how it turned out with the Church paying the boys and girls hundreds of millions of dollars in judgments and having to admit that they, the Catholic Church, did indeed have a very serious problem.
Then, last summer, the Church went too far in my opinion when they issued a prayer to be said before having sex (of course this was intended for married couples only). Well, that punched my last button and I sat down and wrote the following little ditty that I disrespectfully dedicate to The Catholic Prayer before Sex as it might relate to the priest scandal.
Holy Sex! (Holy Shit!)
Now I lay me down for sex
He’s only twelve but what the heck
He’s not developed, that’s for sure
But I could help him to mature
Isn’t that what priests are for?
To give of ourselves in no small measure
In order that we give sexual pleasure
To Catholic boys, so innocent and devout
And suck their willies until they shout
Bless me Father I’m coming in your mouth!
The Catholic Church, Oh what a Mother
Who rewards her children like no other
With a sex prayer that Mom and Dad can state
And maintain their soul’s spotless slate.
Not to be said before you masturbate!
I became a priest, you see,
Not to develop spiritually,
But to hide my homosexuality
1 comment:
Hellooooooooo Out There!!!!!!!!
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